I've always been a goal-oriented person. I've had my career picked out since I was 5. I've had the upcoming decade of my life planned out since I was 10. I've had my huge, gorgeous log-home designed since I was 12.
I think I'm kind of a paradox because I am a very realistic, down-to-earth kind of girl, yet I love to dream and scheme. This comes down to: I know what I want and I'm going to get it. No matter what.
To achieve my goals, I put a lot of pressure on myself. That's fine; I can handle the pressure and if I didn't push myself, I would never accomplish my goals.
But this leads to a problem. Because I expect so much of myself, I also expect a lot from others. I want to be the best that I can be, so I assume that everyone else wants to be the best that they can be. Apparently this is not the case for the average American teen.
I have seen so many of my peers mess their lives up, it's ridiculous. They don't realize that there is so much more to live for then the NOW. They never think about consequences. About the fallout of their actions. About what things will be like in the morning.
It's hard for me to be merciful to my friends and loved ones when they mess up. I mean seriously, why would you hang out with those people? Why would you ever drive after drinking? Why would you talk your friends into messing up their lives too? Why don't you ever think about the future?? About what you could be? About how you could change the world instead of living your life as a nobody loser???
As I sat here thinking about all this, a familiar song started playing on last.fm. It's a song by OneRepublic. The chorus says:
Lost till you're found
Swim till you drown
Know that we all fall down
Love till you hate
Strong till you break
Know that we all fall down
Yes, we ALL fall down. Even me. People are not perfect. I am not perfect. We're only human. (Which makes me think of another song haha: Human by Jon McLaughlin...)
So please Lord... help my calm, rational self not get upset when people mess up. Help me to not get emotional. Help me to forgive in the same way You forgive. Amen.
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August 12, 2009 at 12:50 PM
This sounds like a blog I would write. I've been there, several times actually. It's excrutiating to be the observer of someone else's folly. And that's exactly what the bible calls it. The good in it is that it challenges you to exercise grace and mercy towards others, which is simply part of life. One good way to ease the burden is by spending time with mature, godly people who can help you remember that it IS possible for the immature to grow up :)
August 12, 2009 at 4:25 PM
Yeah that's why I like hanging out with people a few years older than me... most of them have already gone through their "wild" phase haha.
I'm just hoping that by the time the "immature [...] grow up" they haven't ruined their life! :\